Saaaay Cheeeese!

  Your Mom is a photographer so get used to hearing "Say Cheese!". It looks like you are pretty much smiling in this ultrasound shot. And even though you are only 13 weeks 4 days here you already look like your Pops & your sister. You were very active during the ultrasound. You kept doing this laid back pose with your long legs stretched out and your hands behind your head. As if you were sending your nervous nelly folks a message to "Relax guys, I got this".

 The hematoma that's caused us so much greif is looking old and coagulated now said the ultrasound tech. Hopefully this means it won't be there too much longer. My guess is that by our 20 week ultrasound it will be gone. Aaaand by the 20 week ultrasound we should be able to tell if you are a boy or a girl. Since I recently had a dream about the day you are born and you were a girl in that dream, my guess is that you are a girl. You will learn that I have lots of dreams that end up coming true, about all sorts of things but especially about babies. I tend to know when friends or relatives are pregnant before they even know it and while it's kinda freaky it's also kind of awesome. In this lovely dream I had of you and your birthday the nurse handed you to me and you had rockstar hair and lots of it, just like Ellie did, but your hair was much lighter, blondish and you had a really funny cowlick in the front. You looked a lot like your Dad and a bit like Ellie, but different. Point is you were cute and more importantly ALIVE! In the dream I was holding you in my right arm and I looked down at my belly and I could see the stitches from the c-section and I was crying. The nurse asked if everything was ok and I said "Yes it is. I'm just so happy that the surgery went well and that she is here and she's alive!" After waking up from this dream it was the 1st day in a long time that I felt like this could really turn out to be the amazing gift we're hoping for. I sat in the nursery and stared at the closet full of adorable clothes that everyone bought for Ellie and imagined you in them. I was able to think about you sleeping in that empty crib and filling our home with the best noises we'll ever hear...your cries, coos and giggles. I want to hang onto that feeling. You are wanted & you are loved little one.