3rd trimester = descent into madness!!!
It’s no surprise that as we get closer to our due date, things are starting to get a little ummm shall we say nerve wracking? Sleep has been come particularly challenging event. Aside from the typical pregnancy symptoms of back pain, heartburn, finding a comfortable position to sleep in and then waking every 2-3 hours to go pee I’ve also been dealing with my husbands severe case of PILDS (Post Infant Loss Daddy Syndrome…so what! I just made that up). It involves me being woken by my husband several times a night to make sure that I’m sleeping in the right position, and then rising from an awesome nights “sleep” to his favorite question “is the baby kicking?”. He asks this question an estimated 10 times a day. It’s to the point where I’ve agreed to inform him every time the baby starts to move around wherever I may be. I yell it from the shower, the bathroom, next to him on the couch, at dinner, in front of visiting family members. Seth’s case of PILDS also involves food and water checks (how much water have you had today? when was the last time you ate?), sanitation checks and lots of antibacterial wipes and a general overall willingness to do anything and everything to keep me and the baby cakes safe. We are both home full time now that our businesses are both in the “off season”.That is likely adding to the quirky state we are finding ourselves in. We definitely have not lost our sense of humor in all of this which is truly amazing. We make fun of each other when one of us is taking our cautiousness into crazy pants territory and keep each other in check. We laugh a lot and I’m extremely grateful for that!
With this nasty flu season we've had so far we have totally been in hibernation mode. Almost everyone in my immediate family has been sick since Christmas so we've been hiding out avoiding just about every public location possible. Seth has been doing most of the grocery shopping and I might be getting a lil bit stir crazy...just a bit haha! After being sick with the flu at the end of October, early November I've been willing to be a bit of a recluse if it means keeping me and my lil pumpkin head healthy. We bought a crazy juicing machine before Christmas which I'm sure is helping to keep us healthy. It's a heck of a lot easier drinking your veggies than trying to fit them all on your plate! We are probably coming across as a bit extreme & over the top about all of it but we are beyond the point of caring how we come across anymore. We've embraced the madness that is pregnancy after a loss.
We are starting to think about the plans for our nursery decor for our lil guy. It’s very, very strange to even consider planning for the arrival of lil boy blue. How do you make plans for a new baby after never being able to bring home your 1st baby that you so carefully planned for? It’s a crazy mind game. You already love the little dude growing inside of you, and you want to make a space that is all his own but what do you do when that is in the same space you planned your little girl to grow up in. How do we put her things away without feeling like we are in some way putting her memory away? Tricky, verrrrry tricky. We have the photos we have of her and of us holding her out on display and always will. We will always talk about her and share her memory with her little brother, there is no doubt about any of that. But it is really hard to take that step of really putting away all of the things she never used. I’m sure we will figure it all out, we are taking “baby steps” to try and make it easier.
I've started to do twice daily kick counts to try and keep track of how our lil guy is doing. Luckily so far he is quick to respond which makes the process a little less stressful for us. Having stopped to do a kick count the day Ellie died makes it an extra scary process but what else can we do right? Just plowing on thru folks.
We have a doctors appointment tomorrow at which I'm pretty sure we will be scheduling our offical c-section date! We're pretty excited about that! If we deliever around 38 weeks then we only have about 9 weeks to go! Woot! Woot! Here's to a speedy winter season and a very happy, healthy spring!! We love ya lil boy blue- Ma & Pa
No comments:
Post a Comment